Welcome Back! Challenge No. 139 - Encouragement & Celebration!

Sunday, September 27, 2020

Hello My Beautiful Dragonfly Journeys Princesses :)

Did you miss me?  I sincerely did miss you!  After some long thought processes, and maybe just a little arm twisting by a couple of you out there, well here I am and ready for the next Dragonfly Journey my life takes.  Let's also be honest here and I'll just admit I've done a whole lot of online shopping and have tons of new craft supplies I need to start using as well....wink, wink.

My last blog message to you was about basically the book of my life and that the pages that were coming for me I had hoped I could skip right through.  Although they will probably (hopefully) be the worst of my life, I got through them, and I can say I am a much different and stronger gal because of it.  If you're ready to hear about some of those chapters, here goes:

For those who didn't know, the last year and a half have been filled with breast cancer and then metastatic breast cancer.  Last year after hearing my diagnosis, I wasn't going to do anything, which meant I was going to let it ride.  I'd had a great life, I have no kids, no husband, so why was I going to put myself through this, and the odds were stacked against me.  I had waited too long to do something about it, one horrible doctor said.  I kept it from everyone for a while, except for my boss.  I sat in his office, we cried together, he told me I had to do this, and of course you always have to listen to your boss, am I right?  Then after awhile I gathered some of my crafty gal pals and dearest friends into my kitchen and there were many more tears, but I realized I was loved and that I had to try.  I promised I'd try.

I couldn't even say the word; cancer....I have cancer.  I was mad, I didn't want and didn't need anyone's help.  I'm independent and I can do this myself, and except for being driven back and forth to chemo, I pretty much did.  If you were one of those people who tried to help but I pushed you away, I know that wasn't nice of me, but the only way I knew to be at the time.  I look back on some of those really bad days, like falling down the steps because I just needed to get to some water and I didn't want anyone to see how bad I looked.  Then I lost my hair and that as almost as traumatic as hearing the diagnosis.  But I scooped all of that hair up from my bathroom sink by myself, after cutting what was left off with my best craft scissor of course, and cried some more.  Soooo many tears.  My dog, my little man, yes of course he was right by my side, and he knew.

I could go on and on about all of that stuff, but I got through the chemo, the mastectomy with 35 staples in me, then came radiation, and except for 2 weeks off after surgery and a few other not so good days, I kept working too....whew it was a long 2019.  We can all admit that 2020 has been a trip, and for me another PET scan right as 2020 began showed the breast cancer had metastasized into 5 spots of my bones but were very, very small.  My oncologist is one smart cookie, and I'm thankful that she talked me into that scan "just to be sure" because they were found early.  But then in my mind and after all of what I had gone through, and looking forward to a new year and a new start, it knocked me back like nobody's business and everything I had just gone through in my mind was for nothing.  I don't remember leaving her office and driving home.  I was put on more chemo, daily pills this time, and estrogen blocker shots in my butt (so not fun) had new side effects to figure out, maybe not as terrible, but I kept going and doing what they told me to do and that has been my year.

Are you ready for this....are you sure? of my last PET scan, those spots are GONE baby Gone!  I can't believe it, was told in the beginning that I may have to live with this for the rest of my life, however long that may be, and I'm not sure I should believe it, but I'm going to celebrate anyway.  One friend of mine said it was the best news she'd heard in 2020.  I have so many stories I could tell you, some good, some bad, some funny that could only happen to me I swear, some of the craziest things that have been said to me, the hot lab techs that got me through many, many test and scans ;) .... but I'll stop here.

I kicked its butt, lost some of mine along the way (not a bad thing), have hair and eyelashes again, still taking meds with some icky side effects, have things that have take a toll on my body that I will live with, blah, blah, blah, but it's okay and I'm still here.  I have met and now have some new friends, and have even been reunited with others that are now back in my life (more crazy stories I could tell you).  How lucky am I?  How many times do we hear to be thankful for each day?  Well I'm here to tell you I am, even with all of the extra crud that 2020 has brought.  Don't get me wrong, not every day is rainbows and unicorns, but I am so very proud of myself. 
                                                    I DID IT!!
Let's get back to this thing called a blog, shall we, and PLEASE help me celebrate by sharing any type of card of encouragement or celebration and pick up where we left off with Challenge No. 139.  We all need it right now my beautiful Dragonfly lovelies, don't we?

Challenge No. 139:  Encouragement & Celebration! ~

This challenge will be open until Friday, October 30th, have a Happy Halloween on the 31st and a new challenge will begin on Sunday, November 1st.

Thank you,
Jeannie T.

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